The 1998 BEAmer Story Awards

Greetings! Welcome to the 1998 BEAmer Story Awards, the first annual awards given to the cream of the crop of BE stories, presented by the BE Archive. After nominations were accepted from BE professionals (contributors in the BE field), the top five nominees were declared finalists. Then, with voting open to the public, nearly 100 visitors to the BE Archive took the time to fill out a ballot and vote in the 14 categories. The results are below:

Best Author: Plato Voltaire

Vote Tallies:
VotesAuthor
23Plato Voltaire
13Fret Pearson
13Munch Wolf
13Some Sort Of Dog
5Chimerian
4JR Parz (writein)
3DDDave (writein)
3happyguy (writein)
2Bad Irving (writein)
1Adrian Burns (writein)
1Clovis (writein)
1Hugh G. Breastman (writein)
1Marknew (writein)
1Phalus (writein)
1Randomking (*) (writein)
(*) Randomking was not eligible; no stories published in 1998.

Best New Author: Hugh G. Breastman
(not published prior to 1998)

Vote Tallies:
VotesAuthor
39Hugh G. Breastman
13Adrian Burns
9Gunslinger
8Blake Isaac Gordon
2Axolotl (writein)
2Boobarian (writein)
2Clovis
2Randomking (*) (writein)
1Gangnet (writein)
1Hunter S. Creek (writein)
1JR Parz (writein)
1Kyle Shank (*) (writein)
1Master C (writein)
1Red Baron (writein)
1Talon (writein)
1DDDave (**) (writein)
(*) Randomking and Kyle Shank were not eligible; no stories published in 1998.
(**) DDDave was not eligible; had stories published prior to 1998.

Best Vignette (< 10K): The Problem With Magical Bras by Tigeras

Vote Tallies:
VotesStory
26The Problem With Magical Bras by Tigeras
25The Magic of Word Processing by Tigeras
11Milk From MIT by Anonymous
6The Magnificent Merrill by Cornfed
4Sunken Treasure by Boobarian
1Big Enough by Captain Neil (writein)
1Biggest Tits In The World by Captain Kirk (writein)
1Flat at a Gas Station by Munch Wolf (writein)
1Keisha by bobby (writein)
1Laura and Water by Billy McFred (writein)
1Revolutionary Weight Loss Pill by Tigeras (writein)
1Switched Witch by Tigeras (writein)
1Too Much by Master C (writein)

Best Short Story (10-30K): (tie)
Andromeda Rain by Quasimodo, and
Janene's Wishes by JR Parz

Vote Tallies:
VotesStory
17Andromeda Rain by Quasimodo
17Janene's Wishes by JR Parz
15BE and History: The Ancient Greeks by happyguy
13Phone Action by P.M. Driver
10A Night At Houlihan's by Gunslinger
2Star Trek Voyager: Abreast of the Situation by Smurfinator (writein)
2The Virus by Joker (writein)
1Everything Big by Mr. Daliard (writein)
1Jennifer's Breast Enhancement by Red Baron (writein)
1Juliekat's Seduction by GlennG (writein)
1Little Sister by WishizX (writein)
1Nikki's Knockers by David Johnson (writein)
1Slumber Party by Fret Pearson (writein)
1Twins Enslavement - Amber's Tale by JR Parz (writein)
1Virtual Possibilities by Munch Wolf (writein)
1Wife's Revenge by Jim (writein)

Best Novella (31-70K): A Cup Above The Rest by Clovis

Vote Tallies:
VotesStory
22A Cup Above The Rest by Clovis
18Leprechaun Wishes by Bad Irving
15Bikini Beach House Carwash by Fret Pearson
15Growing Like A Weed by Mr.B
8Something in the Water by Some Sort of Dog
2Will's Power by Mighty Lingster (writein)
1Abigail by DDDave (writein)
1An American In Hell by Hugh G. Breastman (writein)
1Charmed by Talon (writein)
1Lipo by Chimerian (writein)
1Payback by csphill1 (writein)
1Witch Wish by Bad Irving (writein)

Best Novel (> 70K): Obsession by Fret Pearson

Vote Tallies:
VotesStory
24Obsession by Fret Pearson
22Would You Like Some Garlic Bread To Go With That Curse? by Blake Isaac Gordon
14Little Hillary and Ms. Hyde by Hunter S. Creek
10Big Blue Marble by Plato Voltaire
5Permutations 1-4 by Gangnet
2Blue Milk by Bad Irving (writein)
2Hillary's Hills by DDDave (writein)
2The Reward by W. G. (writein)
1Alien's Gift by JR Parz (writein)
1Nymphomania by Ed Miller (writein)
1Police Blue: The Movie by Plato Voltaire (writein)
1Sex Game by Randomking (writein) (*)
1SRU: The Contract by Bad Irving (writein)
1SRU: A Strange Solution by Hugh G. Breastman (writein)
(*) Sex Game was not eligible; it wasn't published in 1998.

Best Continuing Series: Alien's Gift by JR Parz

Vote Tallies:
VotesSeries
21"Alien's Gift" by JR Parz
17Blue Undercover by Plato Voltaire
15BreastWORK by DDDave
14St. Cats by Some Sort of Dog
11Healing Hooters by WKLSDDCL
2Dr. Hooters by various (writein)
1In Sequence by Sam. Tuirel (writein)

Best Comedy Story: How Billy Tooley Saved The Planet by the happyguy

Vote Tallies:
VotesStory
24How Billy Tooley Saved The Planet by the happyguy
17Interactive Story by the happyguy
15A Night At Houlihan's by Gunslinger
12BE and History: The Ancient Greeks by the happyguy
9A Joke by Quasimodo
2Witch Wish by Bad Irving (writein)
1Alison's Story by Kuri Manifika (writein)
1Talk Show BE by Adrian Burns (writein)

Best Horror Story: Son of a Monkey's Paw by Munch Wolf

Vote Tallies:
VotesStory
23Son of a Monkey's Paw by Munch Wolf
18Carrie: the BE Version by Adrian Burns
16Sex Machine by Maurice Blue
13Bigger Her by Gangnet
7Teaser by Grosporina
1Permutations by Gangnet (writein)

Most Original Story: BE-Coli by Chimerian

Vote Tallies:
VotesStory
31BE-Coli by Chimerian
20Interactive Story by the happyguy
18The Essence Series by 'Phalus
5The Bountiful West by Plato Voltaire
4Xenoplasm Book 1 by Xenos
3Breast Reduction by Bad Irving (writein)
1Harry Boobday (writein) (*)
1The Reward by W. G. (writein)
1Sex Game by Randomking (writein) (**)
(*) Harry Boobday was not eligible; it was published prior to 1998.
(**) Sex Game was not eligible; it was published after 1998.

Favorite Lead Character: Molly, from Fool For A Day by Munch Wolf

Vote Tallies:
VotesCharacter
28Molly, from Fool For A Day by Munch Wolf
17Lynnae Wilcox, from the Police Blue series by Plato Voltaire
15Richard, from the BreastWORK series by DDDave
10Shan, from the St. Cats series by Some Sort of Dog
2Smegs, from the St. Cats series by Some Sort of Dog
1Ally, from A Cup Above The Rest by Clovis (writein)
1Amy, from Jennifer's Breast Enhancement by Red Baron (writein)
1Hillary, from Little Hillary and Ms. Hyde by Hunter S. Creek (writein)
1Jamie, SRU: A Strange Solution by Hugh G. Breastman (writein)
1Roger, from The Reward by W. G. (writein)

Favorite Supporting Character: The Old Man, from various SRU tales

Vote Tallies:
VotesCharacter
38The Old Man, from various SRU tales
17Mr. Big, from the Police Blue series by Plato Voltaire
13Clara, from the BreastWORK series by DDDave
11Seamus O'Shanty, from Leprechaun Wishes by Bad Irving
2Angelica Grimbeau, from the St. Cats series by Some Sort of Dog
1Betty, from Fool For A Day by Munch Wolf (writein)
1Terrika, from the Healing Hooters series by WKLSDDCL (writein)

Favorite Unusual BE Method: Sun-Induced Growth from Growing Like A Weed

Vote Tallies:
VotesMethod
22Sun-Induced Growth from Growing Like A Weed
18Gene-Spliced with Paper Towels, from Bounty
18Matching Growth, from A Cup Above The Rest
14Billy Tooley's Rod of Power, from How Billy Tooley Saved The Planet
7Filmed BE, from Phone Action
1Flintstones Chewable Breast Enhancers, from Alison's Story (writein)
1Growing Implants, from Breast Reduction (writein)
1Gummi Bears, from Beauties and the Breasts (writein)

BE Hall of Fame

With this category, I did something which in retrospect was a mistake: when I tallied the nominations, I allowed the nominating votes for Al and for Some Sort of Dog to be counted separately, with the result that the two nominations ended up "splitting" his vote. This is unfair, and upon further review I've decided to combine the votes for Al and Some Sort of Dog; people who voted for either one of those were really voting for the same guy, so that's how I've decided to represent that:

BE Hall of Fame: Al/Some Sort of Dog

(recognizing people whose contributions to BE fandom have made them deserving of Hall of Fame recognition)

Vote Tallies:
VotesPerson
33Al / Some Sort of Dog
24Anthony Cotto
20Plato Voltaire
2Bad Irving (writein)
1Chili Palmer (writein)
1DDDave (writein)
1Dr. Enlarge (writein)
1JR Parz (writein)
1McMann (writein)
1Owner (writein)

Congratulations

to all the winners!

And a big thank you to all who voted - thanks for your efforts in helping recognize excellence in the BE community! For all the nominees and finalists who didn't win, remember that every vote you got signifies someone out there who felt your story was literally the best story of the year. And there's always next year - so write more and let's make 1999 an even better year for BE fiction!

Eligibility

In order to be eligible, a story must have been published for the first time in the calendar year 1998. It need not have appeared on the BEA, but it must contain BE elements or themes. Stories from commercial publications (Score, Juggs, etc) were eligible, as were stories posted on other sites (Wren Spot, Diana the Valkyrie, etc). Stories which were published in multiple parts (such as "Foobar Part 1" and "Foobar Part 2") were considered to be one long story. Stories published in multiple parts but not yet complete were considered to be Continuing Series, as were stories which are labelled as being part of an overall series structure (such as the St. Cats stories).

Fans could only vote for one story or person in each category. The totals of votes in some categories will vary due to some voters not voting in some categories. No more than one ballot was accepted per person. Voting took place from February 2- February 21, 1999. Winners were announced March 3.

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